How to name stuff

A bad brainstorm might help

This post is free. If you enjoy it, please tap like or share with a friend.

It’s come to my attention that I’ve done things completely wrong.

I’m referring to the name of this newsletter and nothing else.

Apparently I should have given this thing a more descriptive name, something that announces what it’s about to anyone who happens to come across it.

Plumbing the depths of small business names

Something like “Notes from a Moonlighter,” except not that because I hate it.

Or one of these, I hate them all:

• “Creativity in the Cracks”

• “Published from my Pocket”

• “Pressed for Time Press”

• “Half-Baked Harpy”

Except for “Half-Baked Harpy.” I like that one a little bit.

Why titles matter

There’s a joke that if you want to write something, you should start with the title, because then you’ll know what sort of thing you’re writing. Obviously this is ridiculous, but titles are important. They’re the first words of your story/book/movie/publication, after all.

When well executed, they can

• Act as a hook — Does “Bob’s Plumbing” grab you as much as “Plumb & Order"? Obviously not!

• Reflect the genre — i.e. tonally. It’s clear that if you hire “Plumb & Order” you’re going to get a plumber who takes his work, but not himself, seriously.

• Set expectations as far as story/content — These people are plumbers, that much is obvious. This is the issue I’m considering addressing with “Nardo.”

My tips for titles

This is by no means comprehensive, just a few things I’ve picked up over the years.

Look for standout, loaded images or phrases

In a short piece, this may be more likely to come from the last half or even third. In a novel, I’m apt to say it could come from anywhere. Think: White Teeth or A Room With a View.

Keep it simple

Don’t overthink it or force cleverness (exception if you’re a plumber who’s also a crime procedural fan).

An emblematic word can stand as a title

With or without an article. For example, The Namesake or “Cathedral.” This might also be a character name, as in Emma.

Brainstorming isn’t just about generating good ideas

It’s about getting out bad ones, too. In fact, sometimes I deliberately brainstorm bad names. It helps me loosen up and clear out the dreck.

The conference table where I do all my best bad brainstorming

Just for fun, here are some of the best bad ideas I’ve brainstormed to replace Nardo:

• “The Novelista”

• “Scribe Tribe

• “Words with Sends” (bc it’s a newsletter, get it?)

• “Laptop Lemonade”

• “Muse Clues”

• “Live Laugh Lit!”

Find inspiration in THE CANON

Plenty of titles come from religious texts (Song of Solomon, The Satanic Verses), Shakespeare (Infinite Jest), or poetry (Slouching Toward Bethlehem).

Or just common parlance

For the purposes of this much less lofty newsletter, I searched relevant idioms. Here are some of the ideas I liked, or at least found interesting:

• The Written Work / Written Works — Makes sense given I tend to write about the work of writing, but perhaps a bit too broad

• Body of Work — This might fit if I focused more on writing and ED recovery?

• Gnome de Plume — Fun, but I’m not that hard on myself

• Header Case — Might be cool if I was a journalist

• Must be Draft — A little too cute

• Brain Dump — Feels more fitting for a Substack about ideas, philosophy, etc.

• Don’t Forget to Write! — The right kind of cute, I think

• Word Salad — Like this because I do enjoy a refreshing salad

• Use Your Words — I say this from time to time in real life and also use writing as a form of expressing my Feelings

• Economy of Language — Maybe if I wrote about publishing and the commercial aspects of writing

• In So Many Words — Makes me think of a weekly guest column with an enforced word limit

My top two ideas for renaming Nardo

Drum roll:

1. Don’t Forget to Write! — Again, the right kind of cute IMO, and it fits my focus (so far) on writing, creativity, and getting stuff done

2. Word Salad — I like salad, and this idiom refers to jumbled writing, which feels akin to the original spirit of “Nardo”

Speaking of which, I also still like Nardo because a) it’s unique and something I can “own” and b) it’s close to my heart, as a lifelong nardo.

So, what do you think?

Vote for your favorite name for my Substack. I’ll reveal the update (or lack thereof) next week!